Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
operation harelip BJ is a go
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
