I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Randomize