She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize
