super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Randomize
