Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Randomize
