With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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