Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Randomize
