Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Randomize
