so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
