Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I think I have vodka in my lungs
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
