You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Randomize
