as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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