if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
