He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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