the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
wakey wakey hands off snakey
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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