normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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