so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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