shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
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