It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
