Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
