I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Randomize