I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
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