so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
