I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
