i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
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