Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize