I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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