I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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