i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
well, you know. whores of a feather.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Randomize
