IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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