i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
