its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
