I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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