I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
