Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize