Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Randomize
