I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Randomize
