I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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