I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
