the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
She even gives head with a lisp.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
