I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
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