thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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