girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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