I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
