is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Randomize
