Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Randomize
