Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
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