I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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