i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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