Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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