You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize