The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Randomize
