Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Randomize
